You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
