i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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