i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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