Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Four minutes until I can fart!
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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