She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
