told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
