lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
