At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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