kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
