She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize