You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize