when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
