I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
