Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
