i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize