There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
