At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Come share oat with me in your robe
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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