I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
You were trust falling into bushes
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