Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
