Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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