just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
