woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
a search helicopter?!
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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