eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
