Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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