Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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