You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
