Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
