He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
