i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
It was confusing and full of hummus
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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