She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
