apparently the secret to your success is patron
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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