Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
