I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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