Me. At least after what I've been through.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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