Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize