PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
