just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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