Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
