You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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