He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
