But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize