You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
