I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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