Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
