yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
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