Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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