also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
