I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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