Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
