VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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