If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Let's get the cat blown out
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
